


Change

by RoyallyJeleanor



Category: Emmerdale
Genre: Coda, Fluff, Insecure Robert, M/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-06-06
Updated: 2018-06-06
Packaged: 2019-05-19 00:20:28
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 3,295
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/14863107
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/RoyallyJeleanor/pseuds/RoyallyJeleanor
Summary: When he stopped to consider it he wasn’t really sure why that one comment was the one to really hit him. The one that had been running through his mind over and over again for the last two days.“Back off, tubby.”A quick, smart mouthed quip from his husband said with a smirk. Yet somehow, that was the comment that stuck.-Set after the episode on 6/6/2018 where Aaron wouldn’t let Robert have a donut.





	Change

**Author's Note:**

> I haven’t even watched the episode yet but have seen so many gif sets of Aaron teasing Robert and this came into my head and wouldn’t leave.
> 
> I hope someone enjoys this!

When he stopped to consider it he wasn’t really sure why that one comment was the one to really hit him. The one that had been running through his mind over and over again for the last two days.

“Back off, tubby.”

A quick, smart mouthed quip from his husband said with a smirk. Yet somehow, that was the comment that stuck.

It was almost a running joke, Aaron teasing him about his sweet tooth as he tucked into a toffee crisp while they watched Top Gear. Aaron’s little jibes about his husbands new ‘Dad bod’ accompanied by a gentle poke to the stomach. And that teasing had never affected him, never garnered more than a scoff before he wrapped his arms around his beautiful husband, ‘you love it’ falling off his tongue on instinct.

And he’s never doubted that before. Never before felt the sudden, crippling insecurity that for some reason filled him now.

“I need to get off but meet me for lunch?” The feeling off Aaron pressing a quick kiss to his cheek pulled Robert from his thoughts, a smile tugging at his lips.

“Of course, drive safe,” he replied, reaching out for a proper kiss before Aaron wriggled out of his grip, reaching over to grab an apple from the ornate fruit bowl sat in the middle of the table. ‘Hideous’ Aaron had called it the first time he’d seen it, eyes rolling as Robert explained how it was a piece of art.

Robert tried not to let the rejection sting, his husband was already late for his pick-up, had been running around like a lunatic trying to get ready for the last fifteen minutes, so he knew it wasn’t personal. Yet somehow, that stuck too.

As he watched Aaron practically run out of the door he found his gaze landing back on the artfully hideous fruit bowl. Now that he thought about it, when was the last time he’d eaten anything from it? He really needed to start.

With that, he picked up a banana and two oranges, just to be on the safe side, ignoring the pack of biscuits on the side he’d bought for the portacabin. 

-

“I think I’m gonna get a cheeseburger, I’m proper fancying some of Marlon’s chips,” Aaron murmured as they sat in the Woolpack that lunchtime, his eyes on his phone.

“I think I’m gonna get the salmon,” Robert replied, taking a sip of his orange juice as he watched for his husbands reaction. As expected, Aaron’s eyes were on him in seconds as he scrunched up his face in disgust.

“Salmon?” Aaron practically spit the word out, “why would you put yourself through that?”

Laughing at Aaron’s revolted face, Robert gave a hopefully nonchalant shrug, “I just fancy a change.”

“If you say so, although I don’t know why you’d make a change from delicious to disgusting, but it’s you that has to eat it,” Aaron told him, still confused at his husbands choice. He didn’t think he’d ever seen him eat salmon during the entirety of their time together. And he’d never seen him turn down one of Marlon’s special beef pies which were on the menu today either.

“I’ll enjoy it,” Robert told him, although he wasn’t sure if he was trying to convince Aaron of that or himself.

He’d researched weight loss diets online extensively when he’d got to work, thankful that Aaron was out of the scrapyard for the morning. Apparently salmon was a good choice, especially with salad, so if that’s what he needed to eat to get rid of the tubbiness then so be it. Even if he desperately wanted Marlon’s special pie.

-

Slumping against the wall behind him, Robert reached up to wipe the sweat from his brow before dragging his buzzing phone out of the pocket of his joggers.

“Hey,” he answered immediately, trying to hide how out of breath he was. Aaron would definitely get the wrong idea if he heard him panting down the phone.

“Hey, where are you?”

“Just had to pop into town to meet a client, wanted to sign a contract in person,” Robert replied, wincing at his blatant lie. He hated lying to Aaron.

“Oh okay, thought we could get a takeaway tonight if you fancy?” Aaron asked, the hopefulness obvious in his voice.

Cringing as he desperately thought of how to get out of it, Robert stuttered, “Oh, er, well I was gonna surprise you actually. I wanted to cook for you.”

“You always cook for us, don’t you fancy a night off?”

“I love cooking for you, I had something in mind seen as though it’s just me and you tonight?” Robert had seen so many recipes online that were supposedly low fat and he’d been keeping them bookmarked on his phone, his own little recipe collection. But, he’d seen a spicy chicken curry which had immediately reminded him of Aaron, and it had both low fat and normal options. He was excited for Aaron to try it, although he wasn’t so excited to eat the weight loss version himself.

“Okay, if you want to,” Aaron replied easily. “When will you be home?”

Robert froze, reminded of how surroundings, “I’ll be as quick as I can, promise.”

“I love you,” Aaron replied with a smile before hanging up, leaving Robert, sweaty and exhausted as he was, rushing towards the gym showers.

He wasn’t sure why he didn’t want to tell Aaron about his new gym membership, but he hoped he would enjoy the changes it would bring about in Roberts physique.

-

Robert sighed as he sank into the booth opposite his husband, an orange juice in his hand that he was desperately wishing was something stronger.

“Orange juice again?” Aaron asked, brow furrowed at his husbands sudden change in drinking habits.

“Yeah, just fancied it,” Robert lied, hoping his smile looked more real than it felt. He fancied nothing more than a refreshing cold pint, well except Aaron, but he knew alcohol was one of the biggest culprits of his expanding waistline.

“If you say so,” Aaron muttered, “don’t know why you asked me to come for a pint if you’re just gonna drink that.”

“I didn’t specify what it had to be a pint of,” Robert replied, trying for witty and instead coming off as grumpy.

“You know what, forget it,” Aaron muttered, slamming his pint glass down on the table as he pushed himself up, striding towards the door.

“Aaron, wait,” Robert shouted after him, hurriedly grabbing his jacket to chase after his husband, ignoring the dirty look Chas was sending his way for clearly upsetting her son.

As the cool night air hit his face, the Woolpack door swinging behind him, he felt himself shudder. Breaking into a sprint, which he was pleased to see at least didn’t leave him quite as breathless as it would have done a few weeks ago, Robert desperately ran after his husband.

Finally reaching him on their driveway, Robert gently grabbed his arm, “Aaron I’m sorry.”

“Just leave it Robert, I’m going to bed,” Aaron muttered, pulling out of his grip.

Robert could feel the panic rising in his chest, he didn’t want to give Aaron any other reason to not want him.

“I just wanted to spend time with you,” Robert admitted to Aaron’s retreating back, “I didn’t want a drink but I thought you might and I wanted to spend the evening with you.”

Aaron paused in his tracks, glancing back over at his sheepish husband. “If you wanted to spend time with me, why didn’t you just suggest a movie or something?”

To that, Robert didn’t really have an answer. Well, not one that he’d want to admit. He was hardly going to admit to Aaron that he was scared Aaron wouldn’t want to spend the night alone with just him, or that the thought of them snuggling up on their couch now filled him with panic at the thought of Aaron noticing the shape of his stomach. It had always been one of his favourite positions.

“I thought maybe you’d want to go to the pub?” Robert replied quietly. “Have a pint after a long day?”

Smiling softly at Roberts efforts to make him happy, Aaron moved towards him slowly. “Thanks, but what I’d really like is to take my husband to bed.”

Robert took a sharp inhale at Aaron’s sudden suggestion, feeling his pants become tighter instantly.

“I prefer your idea,” Robert whispered as he meant down to press his lips against his husbands hungrily, his hands curling around his neck.

It wasn’t until he pushed Aaron down on their bed, who eagerly reached up and dragged his jumper over his head, that Robert felt the self consciousness creep back in.

Without even thinking about it, he quickly walked back towards the door and flicked the light switch off, plunging the room into darkness. The only sliver of light came through a gap in their curtains, casting a silver glow across Aaron’s gorgeous face.

“What are you doing?” Aaron asked on a laugh, moving around to turn on his bedside lamp.

“No!” Robert burst out immediately, feeling his insides churn, “it feels more intimate in the dark.”

“Intimate?” Aaron laughed, but he turned back around, leaving the lamps switched off. “Come here you soft git,” he murmured as he dragged Robert down on the bed with him, his hands instantly finding his belt and dragging it off.

“Wow, way to ruin the mood,” Robert chuckled, pushing Aaron’s legs up slightly to drag the duvet out from under him before pulling it up and over their heads. “There, it’s like we’re in our own little world,” Robert whispered as he pressed sloppy kisses down the smooth expanse of Aaron’s neck, his insecurities smothered under the safety of darkness.

-

He looked exactly the same.

Robert felt his bottom lip quiver dangerously as he stared at his reflection in the bathroom mirror, a fluffy white towel wrapped around his hips.

He looked exactly the same.

Rationally he knew he couldn’t expect to have seen much of a difference in just a few weeks but the reality was much harder to deal with. He was exhausted, from the relentless gym sessions and trying to manage his supposedly ‘nutritionally balanced’ new diet. But mostly he was exhausted from lying to Aaron, from pretending to not fancy the takeaway curry that liv had ordered, to not wanting a pint despite no valid reason why he shouldn’t want one, to refraining from ripping his husbands clothes off at any time possible and instead having to wait until they were under the cover of darkness in their room. He was exhausted and it hadn’t even worked.

“Hey, what are you doing?” Aaron’s gentle voice startled him, pulling him back to reality where he realised the shower was still running.

“Oh, just gonna get in the shower,” he replied, a slight blush creeping up his neck as he hastily moved to pull his towel higher up to cover his stomach.

“Aren’t you supposed to take the towel off then?” Aaron replied, a flirtatious smirk on his lips as he stepped closer towards him. “I’m sure I can give you a hand with removing it.”

Robert felt his eyes widen, taking a step back without even realising as he forced out a laugh. “I think I can manage,” he was aiming for jovial but he could hear the panic in his own voice.

“Okay,” Aaron replied, his confusion evident as he stared at his husband. “What have you been doing in here? The showers already been on for 15 minutes, I was expecting you to be done.”

“I-er just,” Robert stuttered, cursing his inability to think of something. “Just bits and bobs, I won’t be long now.”

“Well, seen as though you’ve not got in yet, maybe I should join you?” Aaron suggested, his eyes dark with lust as he moved in close. As he reached up to place his palm against Roberts chest he instantly felt the pounding of his heart beneath his fingertips. Looking up to meet his husbands gaze, he was alarmed when Roberts eyes resolutely refused to meet his own.

This wasn’t like his husband at all, after a suggestion like that from Aaron Rob would usually have had Aaron pinned up against the tiled wall in seconds. But now he looked, embarrassed?

“If you don’t want to, I can go downstairs?” Aaron offered, still trying to catch Roberts gaze.

When Robert didn’t reply, Aaron felt his stomach sink, bile rising in his throat. Did Robert not want him anymore.

Taking a hasty step backwards, Aaron was annoyed to feel tears pricking the back of his eyes. Turning towards the door to hide his pain, he reached for the handle when Robert finally spoke.

“I’ve been trying to lose it,” Robert murmured, “but it’s not working.”

Baffled, Aaron turned back around to face his husband, noticing his arms wrapped self consciously around his middle.

“Trying to lose what?” Aaron asked, a hint of worry now creeping into his voice.

“The tubbiness,” Robert replied quietly.

Aaron felt his eyes widen, his mouth open slack as he stared at Robert, gaze flicking down to Roberts stomach.

When Aaron remained silent, Robert continued, the awkward silence unbearable. “I’m sorry, I know I’ve let myself go recently, I don’t exactly look how I did when we first met. I know it’s probably not that attractive, but I’ve really being trying to get rid of it and I don’t understand why it’s not working,” Robert let out in a rush, shame washing over him.

“Not that attractive?” Aaron breathed out, shock freezing his body to the spot. “You think that, wait, you really think that I don’t find you attractive anymore?”

“Maybe still abit, but I get that it’s not the same and-“ Robert began, before Aaron interrupted.

“I’m more attracted to you now than ever,” Aaron blurted, his cheeks warming at his honesty. “I thought you didn’t want me, usually you’d have jumped me the second I mentioned a shared shower.”

Now it was Roberts turn to be shocked. “What?” Robert was dumbfounded, “of course I want you, I always will, you know I think you’re gorgeous.” Now it was Roberts turn to blush. “I just, well I didn’t want you to see me.”

“Wait a minute,” Aaron began, realisation dawning in him, “is that why you’ve been acting so weird lately? Why we’ve only had sex in the dark for the past few weeks?”

“I didn’t realise you’d noticed,” Robert murmured, ducking his head. “I was planning on getting myself back in shape before you saw me naked again but it’s not been working.”

Taking a deep breath, Aaron stepped closer to his husband, reaching out to entwine one of their hands. “What have you been doing, Rob?”

“Just a few exercise classes, I joined that gym in Hotten and I’ve been doing a diet I found online. Not drinking alcohol either,” Robert practically whispered. “I should have lost the weight by now but it won’t budge.”

Letting out a sigh of disbelief, Aaron reached up with his free hand to lift Roberts jaw and force him to meet his gaze.

“You’re an idiot, you know that?” Aaron asked with a small smile, his thumb tracing soft circles against Roberts skin.

Not expecting that reaction, Roberts brow furrowed as he blinked back in confusion.

“I love you, and I am unbelievably attracted to you, so much that it’s probably unhealthy,” he told his husband with a breathy laugh. “I want you, always, and that has nothing to do with how many hours you’ve spent in the gym or how much you weigh. Why would you ever think differently?”

Robert was floored, his heart beating erratically at his husbands uncharacteristic declaration. He didn’t know what to reply, how pathetic would he look now if he admitted his reasons why?

“Rob, you can tell me anything, you know that yeah?” Aaron urged him on in a gentle voice, and the softness in his eyes was enough to break Roberts resolve.

“You said I was tubby,” Robert whispered, “and I know I’ve got a bit of a Dad bod so I figured you were hinting at me to sort it out.”

Aaron squeezed his eyes shut for a second. He remembered saying it, telling Robert he wasn’t allowed a donut and he needed to back off. It had obviously been a joke, but he’d noticed the way Roberts eyes had clouded over slightly afterwards. But he’d shrugged it off and they continued the teasing later on, he didn’t realise how much it had effected his husband.

“I’m so sorry Robert,” Aaron whispered, a lump in the back of his throat, “I swear I was only messing.”

“Hey, come on,” Robert murmured as he squeezed Aaron’s hand, “this is my fault, I took it personally and let it bother me and I shouldn’t have done. I know you were joking, this is not your fault okay?”

Nodding his head a little jerkily, Aaron blew out a breath to halt the tears. “Okay,” he whispered, his thumb stroking his husbands cheek, “but please promise me you’ll stop worrying about changing yourself. You’re perfect.”

Scoffing slightly, Robert leans forwards to press a chaste kiss to his lips. “You can admit that you preferred me before, I get it.”

“Did you prefer me before?” Aaron asked in response.

“No, I love you more everyday, just as you are,” Robert replied immediately, “but I’ve-“

“No,” Aaron interrupted before Robert could convince himself it wasn’t the same for him, “it’s not different with you at all. I love you exactly as you are now, and I wouldn’t change any part of you for the world, okay?”

As realisation dawned on Robert, he felt the embarrassment creep back in. “I’m sorry for being so stupid.”

“You’re not stupid,” Aaron reassured him, kissing him again, “you just need reassurance every now and again just like I do, and I’m sorry for not giving that to you. If anything, I prefer your dad bod now.”

“Yeah?” Robert asked in disbelief, his lips pulling upwards.

“Yeah. It shows you’re settled and comfortable. Plus, it means your chest is a lot more comfortable to sleep against than it used to be,” Aaron replied with a smirk.

“Oh is that right? Well I’m glad I can serve a purpose,” Robert smirked, reaching out to tickle his hands across his husbands side.

When Aaron burst into laughter, his tears forgotten, and tried to grab hold of his hands, Robert caught a glimpse of himself in the mirror - beaming, his husband happy and glowing beside him as he fought to grapple with his Roberts hands.

And in that moment Robert realised, they were insanely happy, and Roberts appearance had nothing to do with that. They loved each other, and as they grew older and their looks faded and changed, that love was going to remain just as strong.

“I love you,” Robert blurted our, his hands stopping their teasing as instead his arms wrapped around his husbands waist to pull him closer.

“I love you too,” Aaron grinned. “Now, about that shower.”

“Well we’ve certainly wasted enough water, it would be economical for us to share a shower now,” Robert bent down and whispered in Aaron’s ear, revelling in the shiver that he felt pass through his husband.

“I suppose we have no choice then,” Aaron whispered, fusing their mouths together as he hastily pulled at the towel around his husbands waist.

As Robert felt the towel drop to the floor he felt his previous insecurities fall along with it, the beautiful man in his arms his sole focus.

**Author's Note:**

> Thanks for reading!
> 
> I’m also on tumblr at @RoyallyJeleanor :)


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